The 401-Keg plan

You are now wise. You are about to learn the system of stock market investments.

If you had purchased $1,000.00 of Nortel stock one year ago, it would now be worth $49.00. With Lehman Brothers, you would have $1.65 left of the original $1,000.00. With Wellman, you would have less than $ .50 left. If you had purchased Aloha, Frontier, ATA, or Skybus Airlines, you would have nothing left.

But, if you had purchased $1,000.00 worth of beer one year ago, drank all the beer, then turned in the cans for the aluminum recycling refund, you would have $212.00.

Based on the above, the best current investment advice is to drink heavily and recycle. This is called the 401-Keg Plan